update

it's hard to know where to start, i'm sorry it's been so long since i've posted anything. we've had so much going on and so many events to share with you... let me see...

ophelia has lost her first two teeth! we were so excited and the tooth fairy was generous, two dollars in shiny new state quarters for the first tooth and a dollar for the second one. ophelia believes she is very rich... we think so too, but not because of her quarters! she was very brave about loosing her teeth and even lost the second one while we were ate the mall, the hot dog she was eating just about did it for her and mommy finished it off. so now she has a big gaping whole in the middle of her bottom jaw and we can just see one new tooth pushing through. of course, this hole has provided much entertainment for all us with the tricks she can do now! ophelia started school at Valley Oaks elementary School two weeks ago. she started about 2 1/2 weeks late, but she is fitting in very well and loves it. school is an exciting adventure for her and she is excelling beyond our expectations, we are so proud of her. at the doctors office a few weeks ago, we learned that ophelia is in the 95% for height and the 35% for weight, translates, she's tall and thin. i already knew that, shopping for slacks and jeans for her is no small challenge!

lavinia is in pre-school now at st. mark lutheran school 3 days a week and she thinks it is "so much fun!" she loves to tell us that school makes her "so excited!" and she's always asking us when she can go back. i just love how much she enjoys school, we are very grateful for that gift. lavinia is still our talker, very open and expressive and gives us plenty of opportunity to laugh. last night, lavinia spent the night with a friend for the first time, already a very social butterfly. she is also tall for her age, but a little more solid and she still has some of the baby roundness to her face that lights up easily with a charming smile.

helena is walking and more often, climbing all over the place. this is our first climber and it's proving to be a challenge. she doesn't seem to understand why we just won't let her climb everything she can find. she has a full head of hair, the first one of our children to have this much hair this young. helena started in the toddler program at st. mark with the start of the school year. most of the time, she really enjoys it... not crazy about when we drop her off, but that's mostly for our benefit, she becomes a very busy little girl just after we leave. it is sometimes a challenge, with her being just around the corner from my office, jeremy and i have disturbed her a time or two when they were going for a walk, sometimes she gets very happy to see us and waves with a big smile and other times we can hear her wail for a while. she is right in the center for height and weight, a text book average baby.

jeremy and i are doing well, very busy as we gear up for the holidays. we have also had to invest a lot of energy in dealing with the sexual assualt case of ophelia. this has not been easy, very draining and time consuming. still, i am constantly amazed at the strength of our daughters and even ourselves, i know we couldn't do it without Christ. even as we are embroiled with the legal side of this and seeking healing and help, we are even more passionate about using our experience to help educate others. ignorance is not prevention but perhaps is one of the worst offenders in allowing such acts of evil to continue. i must admit to moments of anger in how society, particularity christian society, handles this topic... not even just the topic, but the actual reality of this evil in our communities, alas, even right in front of their faces within our congregations. we aren't sure yet how we are to help raise awareness, but part of what we want is to be able to help other boys and girls that have gone through sexual abuse, educate parents as to how to prevent and if need be, spot signs of sexual abuse, and to help prevent the boys and/or girls (and adults) that are at risk of being the perpetrator in a sexual abuse incident from finding themselves lost in the terrible world of a sexual offender. i believe that if we can help them to see the danger within themselves to cause someone else harm and then teach them how to control their impulse behavior, we stand a chance of sparing even a few from this terrible evil. how we go about this, i'm not sure, but we are praying and seeking God's guidance. as we look at our girls, we wonder what we could have done differently to prevent this, but we know we can't live in the world of "what-if?" it will accomplish no good. still, we are seeking ways to be sure we prevent it in the future of our family.

ophelia is doing very well through all of this, even wants to help in teaching other that "this makes Jesus very sad and it's very mean." she is struggling with post-traumatic stress and we do our best to let her know that she is loved, it wasn't her fault and there is nothing "wrong" with her. we are in therapy as a family and we see God's healing already in our lives. yesterday we learned that there was more in the abuse than we had originally thought, even the possibility of repeated abuse incidents. we learned this through a forensic interview that is the legal testimony of both girls as this case is investigated and charges are being prepared. yesterday was a very long day for all of us, but most of all for ophelia as her day included a forensic sexual assualt physical exam which gave us the results we had prayed for. we have been so grateful for the kindness of all those that we meet through this experience, the forensic interviewer, the social worker, the forensic medical examiner (a wonderful nurse that just made us all so comfortable with a very uncomfortable situation), and so many more. the people that deal with this side of things day in and day out are our new hero's, they are amazing people and we can't thank them enough and pray that God will give them special protection and blessings as they have been just that for us. i don't want to risk compromising the case in anyway, so i can't give details, but the criminal investigation began this past tuesday. as the investigating officer makes her report, we simply do our best to cooperate, we should know within a couple of weeks if and what kind of charges the D.A.'s office will be pressing (the chances are very strong that they will press charges). because the suspect is a juvenile, the case will move a little more slowly than normal, but they have told us they would do their best to get our part out of the way ASAP so we can try to return to a more normal life. we certainly hope so. thank you all for your prayers, please continue to think of us and please, talk with your children, talk with your families, don't live in fear, but live in the confidence that you have done the best you possibly can to protect and educate those you hold so dear. this is the responsibility of all of us.

i'm so sorry that this has been such a long post, i promise to post more regularly again! if you read this in the next few days, please be in prayer for those in the path of hurricane ivan. many members of my family in florida are gearing up for their thrid hurricane in 5 weeks and we are very concerned for their well being.

i hope to hear from you, please feel free to email or comment here, looking forward to hearing how you and yours are doing.

-jessica