Tuesday, January 15, 2008

About freakin' time!

Ok, I know, I know. My posting has stunk to high heaven... as in, non-existent. I won't bore you with the details as to why I haven't, besides, being lazy isn't a good reason (is home schooling and being sick?). I'm likely shutting down this blog and starting a new one as we open a new chapter in our lives. But, for now, I'm back to blogging here.

And to start, I have a super long post about the birth of our 4th daughter, Evangeline Claire.



First, the details:
Evangeline Claire Martin-Weber
Born at home
January 10, 2008
8lbs, 8oz
21 inches long

And now, the very, very, very long story.

The Birth of Good News

Tuesday night, January 8, 2007 I started with my normal pattern of irregular prodromal labor contractions but for the first time I had a complete peace that even if it wasn’t “the real thing” our little girl would be born soon and in the right time. Somehow, I knew it would be soon but didn’t know when soon would actually be. Jeremy and I had a heart to heart talk that if I went past 42 weeks I wasn’t willing to go to the hospital to birth unless we knew there was a good reason beyond some arbitrary date and he actually agreed to help me have an unassisted childbirth if everything looked ok and that was what I wanted… but only if I went past the magic date. I think this was important for me to know and to be able to relax. Wednesday morning came and though there was no baby I noticed that I had a shift in my attitude: instead of impatience about the baby coming I had hope and excitement for the future and began working on plans for following God's call to France. My contractions never did let up but were consistently irregular all day. It was a normal day with the girls, some house cleaning, school work, help clean up some empty lots in the neighborhood and visit with neighbors, and a walk to the park to expend our extra energy. That evening I grew restless over dinner and told Jeremy we needed to get stuff together for the girls to go to our friends. We got the girls in bed, cleaned house some more, I took a bath, hung out and watched Letterman while chatting to friends online, and timed some contractions. Though they were enough to get my attention, they were really inconsistent in strength and timing, I was afraid to get my hopes up so we went to bed. I dozed off and on but the contractions made it hard to sleep, a pattern that I had been living through for weeks at this point. Honestly, I didn’t think it was real labor and I was just getting mad that I was going to struggle to get another night’s sleep. I was right about not getting any sleep! After about 100 trips to the bathroom and regular bloody show I gave up on sleeping and got in the bath again- after about two contractions in there I flew out of the tub saying “why do I try that every time it just makes me uncomfortable!” We started timing the contractions again (“because I’ve either got to stop them or make them do something- it’s shit or get off the pot.”) and sometimes they were 3 min. apart and then sometimes 8, occasionally even close to 15, the strength and duration of each varied. Even though I was feeling that this was serious I couldn’t believe it was the real thing. However, during one of the contractions around 2.30am I told Jeremy that we may want to call Jane, our midwife at least to give her a heads up that something may be up. Can you tell I still wasn’t convinced? I noticed that if I just ignored what was “supposed” to be happening more seemed to get done so I decided that I’d tell Jane that I was fine, she could come and see for herself what was going on but that I didn’t need her there. She decided to come, later she told me that was because she already knew I’d rather go it alone and she figured that the one phone call was all I’d be willing to make. She may have been right. Jane showed up around 3am and watched me for a bit before deciding to set-up “just in case” and then she headed to the couch to go back to sleep. The contractions were completely manageable for me, particularly if I could just completely relax through them. We use the Bradley Method, or the Husband Coached Childbirth method, which I love and as the contractions intensified Jeremy helped me settle into a comfortable position for sleep imitation and would tell me how much he loved me, how strong I am, to relax anywhere there was tension, etc. When a terrible pain started in my left hip because of the baby’s position sometimes I would have a harder time relaxing through a contraction and would end up on my hands and knees locking eyes with Jeremy. If it was particularly bad I’d just say “tell me!” or “Help me!” and he would tell me he loves me in the most calm, soothing voice, his eyes never leaving mine. I love my husband so much more after every birth experience we share together. Those 3 little words are the single most effective phrase to get me to relax and stay calm- hearing them for hours on end really doesn’t get old.

Around 5.30am I felt we should call our dear friend Laura to come help out. Though I still wondered if this was real I knew that even if we went another 2 days without a baby at this point I wanted help for getting food and such. Laura was there for Helena’s birth (a 24+ hour labor, helped support me while I pushed and Jeremy caught) and I looked forward to her calm, female presence. Around the same time Jane called her assistant, I heard her talking to her telling her to come just to beat the traffic but it would be a while yet. Funny, hearing something like that would have potentially disappointed me but I thought “whatever” and let it go. Laura got to our house quickly and quietly came in to say hello. Between contractions she told me how honored she was to be a part of this with us again and I realized that other than Jeremy, she’s the only other person to see me labor and birth more than once. Kinda cool. She asked if it would be ok to read some Scripture she had pulled together for encouragement and support, she tried to read only between the contractions so as not to distract me but they were still so irregular and if she didn’t hear my breathing change she would read through them anyway. It was so cool though, it didn’t distract me at all (and when it did I just vocalized with the contraction and she’d stop but that was usually my hip causing me pain) and some of the passages she read were so beautiful I would feel this deeper connection with my body, God, and the baby and I knew we were on the right track. The pain in my hip became nearly unbearable though and soon I couldn’t do sleep imitation and had to find some movement or positions to help the baby move. I vocalized a lot at this point and would have to mentally tell myself (while Jeremy’s telling me how much he loves me for the 2234987453946813897 time) that the baby was actually going to come out through my cervix and my vagina and not my hip. Yeah, the actual contractions of the uterus were nothing, it was the hip that took everything I had. Things began picking up pretty quickly and I decided that even though it hurt I was going to squat through as many contractions as I could to speed things along. Got through three and by the end of each of them I was on hands and knees. Jane and her assistant Tracy (who rocks, BTW, she had HG with her dd and fought for me all the time- she’s a nurse at the hospital I was in) came in to check and get heart tones, telling me everything is fine. I asked what we can do about the hip and she tells me we could break my bag of waters and get the baby out faster but that’s about it (other than the tons of positions and movement we’d already tried), I just stuck my tongue out at her and she agreed that it was early yet to come to that. The three women leave and Jeremy helps me to the bathroom (to pee AGAIN!) and I sit on the toilet for a second before jumping off onto my hands and knees for a kick ass contraction. Though I didn’t know it at the time, the women were out in the living room and Laura asked if I’d gone through transition yet, they told her no and that it would be a while still. She said something about how some of my vocalizations sounded like I was getting close to pushing, they told her I was nowhere near that. Funny thing was, Laura was totally right. Jeremy and I head back to the bedroom and go through another contraction. I had shut out everyone but Jeremy recognizing the feelings of transition (and savoring the feeling of triumph because I know that means we’re close and it’s real) and decided that though I had been completely against cervical checks I wanted one now, either I’d do it myself or Jane could but I needed to know this was for real. I called for Jane to come tell me what was going on and she checks me and tells me I’m at 8 and that she can feel my bag bulging. Getting back on my knees I have another contraction start (they were still irregular in timing, duration and strength) that built faster and stronger than any I had to that point, I reached for Jeremy saying “TELL ME!” locked eyes with him as he pulled me to him saying he loves me when “pop” my water broke all over him and me. He doesn’t even blink and I don’t look away as we rode out the rest of the contraction but I heared Tracy say “it’s very green.” Through the rest of that contraction my hip began to feel better and I felt my little girl finally tuck her head and slide down to my cervix. After that contraction I kissed Jeremy and told him “we’re going to have a baby!” to which he replied “so I heard!” I looked down at the green mess around us (totally missed the chux pads and hit the sheets, oh well) and sat facing away from Jeremy towards Jane and asked if everything was ok. They got heart tones (perfect!) and told me to expect harder contractions but couldn’t believe it when I said I felt so much better now. They all chatted for about 6 minutes while I rested and enjoyed the feeling of “this is for real” before another contraction came. Everything was so relaxed, we knew I was at 8, knew the baby was finally in the right position, her heart was looking good, the next several contractions were going to be super productive, etc. What was really strange was that I just stayed in this sitting position leaning back against Jeremy, an unusual way for me to labor. The contraction started and I knew it was a totally different animal, this was pushing and that was why I was in that position. I was very quiet at first just breathing but when I felt her moving down in my vagina I began to push with the contraction. Everyone jumped to attention, Jane looks down and says “Uh Jeremy, if you’re going to catch this baby, you need to get on this side of your wife NOW! And Tracy, I need a glove, I need a glove, this baby is coming out!” I also heard her mumble something about “there’s that cervical lip” but I wasn’t sure what she meant. I put my right hand down as I felt her crown and stopped adding any push to the contraction. Jeremy tried twice to get from behind me (HA!) before wrapping his arms around me softly telling me “You catch her, it’s perfect for you to catch her” and I got my left hand down there to apply counter pressure under her head as she slid out into my right hand. Jane got one glove on and checked for the cord (which I barely noticed) and during that one contraction I pushed some more for her shoulders, releasing a gyser of fluid (nasty green with meconium) that drenched Tracy standing there with supplies for Jane, and then I lifted my little girl to my chest. Weak from the intensity of pushing her out I felt as floppy as she was so Jeremy helped me hold her and started rubbing her, Tracy was coming with the suction bulb when our newest daughter let out the biggest, loudest cry I’ve ever heard come from a newborn! We checked her over and covered her with warm towels while she screamed her head off and I got ready to deliver the placenta. Ten min. later the placenta was out and she was nursing like a pro. After weight checks and all of that Evangeline Claire Martin-Weber and I relaxed in the bath 30 min. later and we all enjoyed eggs and spinach (thank you Laura!) with sides and champagne toasting our Good News. Oh, and I loved eating! Though I fought nausea during labor I didn't vomit at all and now I'm completely Hyperemsis free and hungry, it's great!

It was by far the strangest labor I’ve had and I loved it. The pain in my hip was no fun (it wasn’t for her either, she had a bruise and a ridge on her head from her bad position) but every other aspect was simply amazing. Getting to catch my baby was the highlight, what an awesome experience!

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